What is the essence of who you are?

What is the essence of “Your life”? Based on a question asked and answered by Echart Tolle.

Our true identity is revealed in a lecture by Eckhart Tolle. He does so by pointing out a duality in our thinking, created by a simple misconception. This way of thinking can lead to pain and suffering through constant abusive thinking. Let’s work through his lecture and reveal the point he is making.

You can watch the lecture on YouTube.

Introduction

First, it is important to understand that what he is saying is not designed for you to stop working on improving your life. By understanding the meaning of his lecture you can experience life better, and reduce the pain and suffering caused by negative thinking.

The Problem.

You do not have a life. Strange idea, but think about this. The structure of that sentence implies that you exist and have a life. That is a duality. It refers to two parts, “You” & “The Life” that you have, which is not true.

So, once again, you do not have a life, you are life. A singular instance of you. By uptaking, the “My Life” way of thinking creates a whole additional mental framework that leads to the next part. This happens automatically, where suddenly you realise the possibility of losing that life and instantaneously the Fear exists. You come to realize that you may lose that life.

He uses the cemetery as an example: “You visit the cemetery and say to yourself, look at all these people, they once had a life and now they all have lost it. And that’s going to happen to me too.”

All of that thinking happens without you realizing that you are trapped in nothing else but mental formations. That way of thinking creates an illusionary perception of reality. In other words a delusion.

The truth is, you do not have a life, you are life. Without life, there cannot be you, meaning you and life are the same thing. So you can’t HAVE it. If you think clearly about this, you cannot lose your life, because you are it. This leads to a much deeper meaning of what is life.

By coming to the realization that you are living, and do not have a life, you put an end to the duality.

The essence of your identity.

By realizing the true essence of life is that you are living, and you put a stop to the way of thinking about your own life as a separate thing, many awakening experiences can now come to light.

Let’s ask a question to better understand this. What will you answer if someone asks you, who you are?

This is always a surprising question and a hard one to answer. So let’s first answer the question from the Duality point of view. The way a person will identify with themselves while living in the mental construct of “My Life”.

In this case, the answer will almost always be related to physical things, belongings, my body, my work my function in society, friends etc. This means that you are constantly comparing yourself to others.

Let’s look at an example, you identify with your body, and you think your body looks better than others. That is also a duality, a standard you set in your mind that does not exist in reality. So the “Thought” of your body makes you superior to others.

So, for a few years, you can walk around showing off your body on the beach, and it makes you feel good about yourself. After a while, one day, you look in the mirror and get a shock….What happened? Obviously, there is something wrong with the mirror, in the past mirrors were made so much better!

This can also work in the opposite direction, maybe your body is not great, and then you end up saying, I am so much more intelligent than all these beach bums. Some people identify with being a more spiritual person. So you can’t afford that Ferrari, now you say: look at these materialistic people, I am so much more spiritual than them.

There are many examples based on these conceptual standards set by duality. To derive an identity from all those things, “Your Life”, you are living in a delusion.

The Sense of Being.

This is the hard part, how do you get a sense of being, or how do you identify yourself as being alive? Deep down everyone has this sense of being. It is a matter of realizing that there is no way to describe your being. You simply “Are”, that is life.

To experience this you need to stop the constant train of thinking. The always ongoing relentless stream of thinking. Only then can you get the true sense of being alive?

This happens spontaneously to everyone, but not everyone can willingly or by choice stop the train of thought. 

The question here is: Can you get a sense of your being, without a reference to history, experiences or any thought? 

Who am I?

The answer to this cannot be described in words or concepts like that originate from the “My Life” way of thinking. You can only become aware of yourself when the stream of thoughts stops and this doesn’t mean you go to sleep. 

Let’s take an example everyone experienced before: Petting your dog or cat. Have you ever realized that after petting an animal, you feel good for a second or two? Why?

The answer is tricky, but let me try and make it easy. Your pet does not have the “My Life” construct, they are not judgemental and have absolutely no opinion about you. Animals are conscious but lack conceptual thinking to create the ongoing stream of thoughts.

So, at that moment when you are petting them, for a couple of seconds, you spontaneously let go of your conceptual train of thought and awareness arises. As I mentioned before, not sleeping, 100% awake, and without thinking, you become more aware.

This is maybe only for a couple of seconds, but it is enough to last and make you really sense your being. That is why people love their pets so much. The same can happen with certain physical activities. 

Let’s say you are busy rock climbing, at that moment physical activity demands so much concentration, that you have no time or energy to maintain the insistent stream of thinking going on in your head and as a result amplifies your awareness. 

Once again, that leaves you feeling good.

The stillness of the mind.

There is an old story about a student saying to his teacher: “The world is so terrible, it’s filled with war and hatred. I wanted to change that and tried for a long time to change the world but could not come right. I didn’t even make a small change and feel like giving up.”

The wise teacher replied: “If you do not like the world, do not waste your energy trying to change it, change yourself.”

With all of that said, the conclusion here is that the only way to experience happiness in all circumstances, no matter how bad you may think it is, is to change your thinking.

You need to stop thinking. Stop the constant train of thoughts driving you to sadness and depression and whatever else. To stay sane, you have to learn to quiet your thinking and attain stillness of mind.

Only then can you truly know the essence of who you are?